Getting engaged is such an exciting moment. There’s the proposal, the phone calls to family, the celebrations with friends, and of course the moment you finally get to wear that ring.
But after the excitement settles down a little, a lot of couples suddenly find themselves wondering the same thing:
“Okay… now what?”

If you’ve just gotten engaged and have no idea where to start with wedding planning, you’re definitely not alone. I see this question come up all the time, and honestly it makes sense. There are so many moving pieces involved in planning a wedding that it can feel overwhelming at first.
The good news is that once you break things down into a few simple steps, it starts to feel much more manageable.
So if you’re wondering where to begin, here’s a simple guide to help you get started.

Before you dive into spreadsheets, venue tours, and wedding checklists, take a little time to simply enjoy being engaged.
It can be really tempting to jump straight into planning mode. The excitement is high, everyone is asking about the wedding, and suddenly you’re seeing ideas and inspiration everywhere. But this stage of life is special in its own way, and it goes by quickly.
Give yourselves a moment to soak it in.
Call your family and close friends, celebrate together, and share the news with the people who mean the most to you. Maybe you plan a small celebration dinner, take engagement photos, or just spend a quiet evening together talking about what the future looks like.
This season doesn’t have to immediately turn into a to-do list.
You’ll have plenty of time to plan venues, meet with vendors, and make decisions about all the details. Taking a little time first to enjoy the excitement of being newly engaged helps you enter the planning process feeling relaxed and excited rather than overwhelmed.
A few simple ways couples often celebrate this time include:
These moments are part of your story too, and they deserve to be enjoyed before the planning begins.
Once you’ve had a little time to celebrate and settle into this new chapter, you’ll be in a much better place to start making decisions about the wedding itself.

Before you start touring venues or reaching out to vendors, it’s really helpful to take some time to talk about what kind of wedding you both envision.
A lot of couples jump straight into planning logistics, but having a conversation about the overall feel of the day first can make the rest of the planning process much smoother. You don’t need every detail figured out yet. The goal is simply to start getting a sense of the experience you want to create.
Every couple’s vision looks a little different. Some people picture a large celebration with all of their friends and extended family, while others imagine something smaller and more intimate. Some couples love the idea of a formal evening wedding with elegant details, while others prefer a relaxed outdoor celebration.
There’s no right or wrong answer. What matters most is that the wedding reflects the two of you.
A few questions that can help guide this conversation include:
You don’t need to have all the answers right away, but having this conversation early helps you stay aligned as you start making decisions together.
It can also be helpful to spend a little time gathering inspiration during this stage. Looking through wedding galleries, Pinterest boards, or venue photos can help you both get a better sense of what styles and environments you’re naturally drawn to.
Once you have a general vision for the kind of celebration you want, it becomes much easier to move on to the next steps, like setting a budget, creating a guest list, and starting your venue search.

One of the most important conversations to have early in the planning process is about your wedding budget. It might not be the most glamorous part of wedding planning, but having a clear idea of what you want to spend will make every decision that comes after much easier.
Your budget will influence things like the venue you choose, the size of your guest list, and which vendors you prioritize. You don’t need to have every dollar accounted for right away, but establishing a general range gives you a helpful starting point.
Many couples begin by asking a few simple questions:
Once you know roughly what you want to spend, you can start allocating portions of that budget to different categories.
Wedding budgets vary widely depending on guest count, venue, and the level of detail involved. But it can be helpful to understand what couples typically spend so you have realistic expectations as you begin planning.
Nationally, the average cost of a wedding is around $33,000–$36,000 depending on the year and data source.
In the Midwest, weddings are often a bit more affordable than in major coastal cities. For example, weddings in Kansas average roughly $20,000–$21,500 for the ceremony and reception.
Here in Kansas City specifically, the average wedding cost is around $34,000, although many couples spend anywhere from $20,000 to $40,000+ depending on guest count and vendor choices.
For a wedding with about 150 guests in Kansas City, a realistic overall budget often lands around $40,000–$42,000.
These numbers can sound intimidating at first, but remember that weddings can vary widely. Some couples plan beautiful celebrations for under $20,000, while others invest significantly more depending on the experience they want to create.
Once couples decide on a general budget, it helps to understand how that money is typically distributed across vendors.
A common breakdown looks something like this:
The venue and catering are almost always the largest portion of the budget, often accounting for over half of the total cost.
Understanding this breakdown helps couples prioritize where their money will go and prevents surprises later in the planning process.

Not every part of the wedding will matter equally to every couple, which is why it’s helpful to decide early on what your priorities are.
Some couples care most about the guest experience — great food, an open bar, and an incredible party atmosphere. Others prioritize beautiful design and floral installations. And many couples place a high priority on photography so they can preserve the memories from the day.
There’s no wrong answer, but having clarity around your priorities helps guide your spending decisions.
For example:
If photography is important to you, you may choose to invest more in your photographer and simplify other areas like decor or favors.
If guest experience is your focus, you might prioritize catering, bar service, and entertainment.
Your budget should reflect what matters most to the two of you.
One thing I often remind couples is that your wedding budget isn’t just about spending money — it’s about intentionally investing in the parts of the day that matter most to you.
Once you identify those priorities, the rest of the planning process becomes much clearer. Decisions feel easier, and you’ll feel more confident about where your money is going.
From there, the next step in the planning process becomes much more exciting: starting your venue search and securing the date for your wedding day.

Once you’ve started thinking about your budget and the overall vision for your wedding, the next step is creating a rough guest list.
This doesn’t need to be perfectly finalized right away, but having an estimate of how many people you plan to invite will make the rest of the planning process much easier—especially when it comes to choosing a venue.
Many venues have capacity limits, and catering costs are usually calculated per guest. Because of that, your guest count will directly affect your venue options, overall budget, and the feel of your wedding day.
Start by sitting down together and listing the main groups of people you want to include.
For most couples, that includes:
At this stage, the goal is simply to get a realistic estimate of your guest count, not to finalize every name.
Your guest count will also shape the atmosphere of your wedding.
Larger guest lists tend to create a more grand, energetic celebration, while smaller guest lists often feel more intimate and relaxed.
Neither option is better than the other—it simply depends on the experience you want to create.
Some couples love the idea of a big celebration with a packed dance floor and lots of guests. Others prefer a smaller gathering where they can spend more time with each person attending.
Thinking about the kind of atmosphere you want can help guide your guest list decisions.
Another question many couples consider early on is whether children will be invited to the wedding.
Some couples choose to make their wedding family-friendly, while others prefer an adults-only celebration. Both options are common, and the right choice depends on what feels best for you.
If you’re considering an adults-only wedding, you may want to think about how that will affect guests who have young children traveling to attend.
On the other hand, including children can make the day feel more relaxed and family-centered.
There’s no universal rule here—it’s simply about deciding what fits the environment you want for the day.
Plus-ones are another part of guest list planning that couples often think about early on.
Some couples offer plus-ones to all single guests, while others limit them to guests who are married, engaged, or in long-term relationships.
Offering plus-ones can make guests feel more comfortable, especially if they won’t know many other people attending. However, it can also significantly increase your guest count.
Because of that, many couples decide on a simple guideline, such as:
Setting clear guidelines early can help avoid confusion later.
Your guest count will also influence which venues are possible for your wedding.
For example, a venue that comfortably holds 75 guests may not work if your guest list grows to 150 people. On the other hand, a very large venue can sometimes feel empty if the guest list is small.
That’s why creating a rough estimate early on is so helpful. When you begin touring venues, you’ll already have a general idea of the capacity you need.
It’s completely normal for your guest list to evolve as you continue planning.
As you start talking through family expectations, venue options, and budget considerations, you may find yourself adding a few names or removing others. Sometimes parents request additional invitations, sometimes couples realize they want a more intimate celebration, and sometimes venue capacity naturally helps narrow the list.
Another thing couples often wonder about is how many guests will actually attend.
While every wedding is different, a common rule of thumb is that about 75–85% of invited guests will RSVP yes. That number can vary depending on factors like travel distance, the day of the week, and the time of year.
For example:
However, when it comes to planning your wedding, it’s always safest to plan as if every invited guest will say yes.
Venues have maximum capacities, and vendors like caterers need to know the potential headcount early in the planning process. If you assume fewer guests will attend and then receive more RSVPs than expected, it can create unnecessary stress later on.
That’s why starting with a realistic estimate of your guest list is so helpful. Even though the final number may shift slightly, having a strong starting point allows you to confidently move forward with venue tours and the next steps of planning.
Once you have a rough guest count in mind, the next exciting step is choosing the venue where your wedding day will take place.

You don’t necessarily need to pick an exact wedding date right away, but it’s very helpful to think about what time of year feels right for your wedding.
Many venues and vendors will ask about your preferred season before discussing availability, so having a general timeframe in mind makes the early planning stages much easier.
Each season offers its own atmosphere, color palette, and overall experience. Some couples are drawn to spring blooms and fresh greenery, while others love the cozy textures and warm tones that come with fall weddings.
If you’re planning a wedding in Kansas City, it’s also helpful to consider the typical weather patterns for each season.
Below is a quick overview of what each season tends to look like in the Kansas City area.
Spring weddings are known for their soft, romantic atmosphere. Gardens and parks begin to bloom, trees turn green again, and the overall aesthetic often feels fresh and light.
Average Kansas City temperatures:
Pros of a spring wedding:
Things to consider:
Because of this, many couples planning spring weddings prefer venues that offer both indoor and outdoor options.
Summer is a popular season for weddings because of the long days and vibrant natural light.
Kansas City summers are full of lush greenery and colorful flowers, which can make outdoor ceremonies especially beautiful.
Average Kansas City temperatures:
Pros of a summer wedding:
Things to consider:
Many summer weddings in Kansas City schedule ceremonies closer to sunset to avoid the peak heat of the day.
Fall is one of the most popular seasons for weddings in the Midwest, and it’s easy to see why.
The weather tends to be comfortable, the light is beautiful, and the changing leaves create a stunning backdrop.
Average Kansas City temperatures:
Pros of a fall wedding:
Things to consider:
Because fall is so popular, couples often book venues 12–18 months in advance for prime September and October dates.
Winter weddings can feel incredibly elegant and intimate. While they’re less common than spring, summer, or fall weddings, they often offer a unique and cozy atmosphere.
Average Kansas City temperatures:
Pros of a winter wedding:
Things to consider:
Because of the colder weather, many winter weddings focus on beautiful indoor spaces with warm lighting and elegant decor.
Each season offers something special, so the best choice ultimately comes down to the atmosphere you want to create.
Some couples prioritize comfortable weather for outdoor ceremonies, while others care more about the aesthetic of the season or the availability of their favorite venue.
Once you have a season in mind, you’ll be in a great position to start touring venues and narrowing down potential wedding dates.

Once you have a rough guest count and a general timeframe in mind, the next big step is choosing your Once you’ve thought about your guest count, general budget, and preferred season, the next step is one of the most exciting parts of wedding planning: finding your venue.
Your venue sets the foundation for almost every other decision you’ll make. It influences the overall atmosphere of your wedding, how many guests you can invite, your décor needs, and even which vendors you hire.
Many couples start by browsing venues online, saving their favorites, and then scheduling tours to see the spaces in person. As you explore options, there are a few key things worth paying close attention to.
Kansas City Wedding Venue Resources: Kansas City Wedding Venues with a European Feel, Best Kansas City Wedding Venues, Kansas City Wedding Venues Guide, Kansas City Wedding Photographer Shares 7 Elegant Venues, How Your Wedding Location Impacts Your Photos
Not all venues operate the same way. Some are all-inclusive, while others are more of a blank canvas where you bring in everything yourself.
All-inclusive venues typically provide several elements of the wedding for you, such as:
These venues can simplify the planning process because many pieces are handled in one place.
DIY or blank-slate venues, on the other hand, may only provide the physical space. You’ll often need to bring in additional vendors for things like:
These venues can offer a lot of creative flexibility, but they usually require more planning and coordination.
Neither option is better than the other. It simply depends on how hands-on you want to be during the planning process.
If you’re dreaming of an outdoor ceremony, one of the most important questions to ask is:
“What happens if the weather doesn’t cooperate?”
Kansas City weather can be unpredictable, especially in the spring and fall. A great venue will have a clear backup plan in place so your day can still run smoothly.
Things to ask during your venue tour include:
Having a solid weather plan can bring a lot of peace of mind as your wedding day approaches.
Another important thing to consider is how much transformation the space will require.
Some venues already have beautiful architecture, large windows, or elegant details that create a stunning backdrop with minimal decor.
Other venues are more neutral and may require additional design elements to bring your vision to life.
When touring venues, try to imagine the space during your wedding.
Ask yourself questions like:
Choosing a venue that already aligns with your aesthetic can often save money on decor and simplify the planning process.
Beyond aesthetics, venues also play a big role in the overall flow of your wedding day.
During your tour, consider practical details such as:
These details may seem small at first, but they can make a big difference in how smoothly the day unfolds.
Ultimately, your venue is one of the most important decisions you’ll make during the planning process.
Once you’ve chosen the space, many other pieces begin to fall into place. You’ll have a clearer sense of your design direction, timeline, and vendor team.
Taking the time to find a venue that fits your vision, guest count, and overall experience will make the rest of wedding planning feel much more straightforward.

If your budget allows for it, hiring a wedding planner can make the entire planning process significantly smoother and far less stressful.
Planning a wedding involves dozens of moving pieces: coordinating vendors, managing timelines, reviewing contracts, making design decisions, and keeping everything organized. A planner helps guide that process so you’re not trying to figure everything out on your own.
Many couples initially assume planners are only for very large or luxury weddings, but the truth is that a planner can be helpful at almost any budget level, especially if you’re balancing busy schedules or planning from out of town.
Kansas City Wedding Planner Resources: Top Kansas City Wedding Planners, Writing Your Wedding Day Timeline: A Guide for a Stress-Free Celebration
A good planner does far more than simply decorate the space. Their role is to manage the entire planning experience so you can focus on enjoying the engagement and the wedding day itself.
Some of the things planners typically assist with include:
Because planners work in the industry regularly, they also often have strong relationships with venues and vendors, which can make the entire process more efficient.
Not every couple needs full-service planning. Most planners offer a few different levels of support depending on how involved you want them to be.
Full-Service Planning
This option is the most hands-on and typically includes help with:
This is ideal for couples who want guidance from start to finish.
Partial Planning
Partial planning usually begins after you’ve already secured a few key vendors, like your venue or photographer. The planner then steps in to help refine details, manage logistics, and finalize the overall plan.
Month-Of or Day-Of Coordination
This option focuses primarily on executing the wedding day itself. The coordinator ensures vendors arrive on time, manages the timeline, and handles any issues so you and your family don’t have to.
Even this level of support can make a huge difference in how relaxed the wedding day feels.
One of the biggest benefits of working with a planner is that they help you avoid common planning mistakes.
They understand typical timelines, realistic budgets, and the small details couples often overlook when planning on their own.
Instead of spending hours researching and second-guessing decisions, you have someone experienced guiding you through the process.
This support can make the difference between feeling overwhelmed during wedding planning and feeling excited about each step along the way.
At the end of the day, a wedding planner’s role is to help protect your experience.
They act as your advocate with vendors, help troubleshoot problems behind the scenes, and ensure that everything unfolds the way you envisioned.
For many couples, having that level of support allows them to fully relax and be present during one of the most meaningful days of their lives.

Once you’ve secured your venue and chosen a general wedding date, the next step is booking your priority vendors.
These are the vendors that tend to book up the fastest and play a major role in shaping your wedding experience. Because many of the most sought-after vendors only take on a limited number of events each year, it’s best to secure them as early as possible.
Starting with your top priorities also helps you build a strong vendor team that works well together and understands your vision for the day.
Kansas City Wedding Vendor Resources: The Ultimate Guide to Hiring a Kansas City Wedding Photographer
Every couple values different aspects of their wedding. For some, photography and videography are the most important investments. For others, it might be entertainment, food, or design.
A helpful way to approach this step is to ask yourselves:
For many couples, photography, videography, and entertainment are among the top priorities because they preserve the memories and shape the overall energy of the celebration.
Some vendors tend to book much earlier than others, especially for popular wedding seasons like spring and fall. Here’s a general timeline for when most couples book their key vendors.
12–18 Months Before the Wedding
These vendors often book the earliest, especially for popular dates:
Photographers and planners often accept a limited number of weddings each year, which means their calendars can fill up quickly.
9–12 Months Before the Wedding
Once the major vendors are secured, couples typically move on to vendors that shape the overall guest experience.
This may include:
These vendors play a major role in the overall look, feel, and atmosphere of the day.
6–9 Months Before the Wedding
As the wedding gets closer, couples often begin booking the vendors that add finishing touches to the celebration.
This might include:
While these vendors may have slightly more availability, it’s still a good idea to secure them well in advance.
The earlier you begin reaching out to vendors, the more options you’ll have available.
Many of the most experienced and in-demand vendors book out a year or more in advance, particularly for peak wedding dates.
Booking early also gives you time to:
Your vendors will play a huge role in shaping the overall experience of your wedding day.
When you find vendors whose work you love and whose personalities feel like a good fit, the planning process becomes much more enjoyable.
Once your venue and priority vendors are booked, many of the biggest pieces of wedding planning are already in place. From there, you can start focusing on the fun details that bring your vision to life.

Once the big pieces of your wedding are in motion, this is where the fun and creative side of planning really begins.
Gathering inspiration helps you start visualizing how your wedding might look and feel. It’s also incredibly helpful when communicating your ideas to your planner, florist, photographer, and other vendors.
You don’t need to have a perfectly defined style yet. The goal at this stage is simply to start noticing what you’re naturally drawn to.
Wedding Inspiration Resources: 5 High-End Touches That Instantly Elevate Your Reception Design, Elegant Wedding Details That Elevate Your Entire Day
There are so many beautiful sources of inspiration available today. A few of the most popular places couples look include:
As you browse, start saving anything that catches your eye.
You might find yourself drawn to certain color palettes, floral styles, lighting setups, or overall aesthetics without even realizing it. Over time, those saved images will begin to reveal a pattern.
One helpful mindset is to think of inspiration as a starting point, not a blueprint.
Most of the images you see online are styled shoots or weddings with very specific budgets, locations, and vendor teams. Your wedding will naturally be unique to you, your venue, and the vendors you choose.
Instead of trying to recreate a single image exactly, look for overall themes in what you’re saving.
For example, you might notice that many of the images you love share similar elements like:
Those patterns help your vendors understand the feeling you want to create, which is far more helpful than trying to replicate one exact photo.
It’s easy to fall down a Pinterest rabbit hole and suddenly feel like there are thousands of decisions to make.
Try to remember that inspiration is meant to spark ideas, not create pressure.
Your wedding doesn’t need to look like a magazine spread to be meaningful and beautiful. The most memorable weddings are the ones that feel personal and genuine to the couple.
Once you’ve gathered some inspiration, your vendor team can help guide you toward options that work best for your venue, your priorities, and your budget.

Wedding planning can sometimes feel like a lot, especially when you’re juggling work, life, and all the decisions that come with planning an event.
Try to remember that this season is ultimately about celebrating your relationship and the life you’re building together. Focus on what matters most to you as a couple, and don’t feel pressure to follow every tradition or trend you see online.
The most meaningful weddings are the ones that truly reflect you as a couple.
If you’re in the early stages of planning your Kansas City wedding, you’re probably realizing pretty quickly that there are a lot of decisions ahead. From choosing a venue to finding vendors you trust, the process can feel exciting, overwhelming, and everything in between.
One of the things I care most about as a photographer is helping couples feel comfortable, relaxed, and fully present throughout the experience. Your wedding day goes by incredibly fast, and having a photographer who can guide you through the process while still capturing natural, meaningful moments makes a big difference.
If you’d like to see more of my work and get a feel for the kind of images I create for my couples, you can explore some of my recent weddings here:
https://cassidydrury.com/galleries
And if you’re currently looking for a Kansas City wedding photographer and want to check availability for your date, you can reach out here:
https://cassidydrury.com/inquire
I’d love to hear more about what you’re planning and how I can help bring your vision to life.
Whether your wedding is an intimate gathering or a grand affair, I create fine art photography that tells the story of your love with intention and artistry. Each photograph is crafted to feel timeless, allowing you to revisit the beauty, emotions, and unforgettable moments of your wedding day for generations to come.
Whether you’re planning an intimate celebration or an extravagant affair, I specialize in crafting fine art wedding photography that captures the true essence of your day. Each image is thoughtfully designed to be a timeless reflection of your love, ensuring that you’ll relive every emotion and moment for years to come.
I’m intentional about the number of weddings I take on each year so I can give every couple the attention and care they deserve. If you’re planning your celebration, I’d love to hear more about it and connect.
Inquire Now
based in Kansas City
romanticizing life in beautiful locations around the globe
Cassidy Drury is a Kansas City wedding photographer specializing in fine art and editorial photography. She captures timeless weddings and love stories throughout the Midwest and destinations worldwide.
Cassidy Drury
